Tag: Covid

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APATHY

9 April, 2022

/ˈapəTHē/  (Noun) lack of interest, lack of enthusiasm, or lack of concern.

I had chosen two other subjects for this post, but alas, I became very “blah” about them and stopped. Being that it has been a while since I posted last, it occurred to me that my general indifference to almost everything might be a subject I could stay on course with because there is plenty of fuel to keep it burning. 

Covid-19 has changed the way many people act and react over things. It is not the short-term disappointment of a temporary dip in the stock market, or do I wear a mask or not. Covid-19 has become the long term gift that just keeps on giving. The changes and often bizarre effects of having had Covid are as stoppable as a moving train (not), and equally as hard to jump on to. Mutations of the virus, mask mandates and rescission, vaccines, anti-vaxxers, travel restrictions and quarantines, things which literally change day to day … how do you keep up and stay informed without wearing yourself out? Staying even partly informed is exhausting.

I realized that I am living with a great deal of apathy – different from my normal course of depression which situationally sits at about an 7 to 9 out of 10 – and I also realized that the isolation and imprint of crises after crises from Corona virus is probably the cause. On any given day of depression I might be mopey, have firm “no’s” on things I do not want to do, I might feel like crying for no reason at all, I do things that need to get done but I do them dragging my feet. If I am in an opposite spell of mania, well, Hell, there ain’t no stoppin’ me now! I am that freight train. You name it and I’ll have done yesterday! I actually miss those days. I could go on for days on end doing “stuff,” but that just doesn’t happen anymore.

Anxiety is also one of those unpleasant things I live with every day and often tends to be holding hands with Apathy, hopping and skipping down the trail of life. But apathy is new to my palette. I know what I need to do but I have no interest in doing any of it. Decision making is for others. Action is best left to real super heroes. There is no moaning, “Oh! Not now.” I have managed to put off even the simplest and most mundane of tasks because I just don’t have the energy (or the interest) in doing them. I have a box of my parents and grandparents papers sitting in a box under the chair in my sitting room. It has been there about a year and I have only peeked through it peripherally. I have also needed to work in the garden for quite a long time. Bad weather has been my friend so that I do not have to commit to doing any of it, but a day finally came up last weekend where I was able to get a couple of ours in. Despite the drudgery of it all, I was pleased with the tiny quarter I cleared up. Of course, it brought to attention a garden path (this makes at least two now) that needs to be gutted and re-laid. I’d rather run in front of a car, but alas, I am not interested in getting out of my chair to do anything other than maybe go take yet another nap. Naps are good, they require very little of me.

Experts and those interested in the subject of Apathy, which many believe is the byproduct of the Covid pandemic, its social distancing, its isolation, the fear of coming into contact with others, years of working from home (isolation again) for so many, fear of large traditional gatherings like weddings and holidays, and the stresses and anxieties of those who still work directly with the public, and the lack of trust in others say that Apathy may have only been a nominal part of the lives of few, but Corona has given it a spark which has taken off like wildfire. Experts agree that it is going to take many years and a lot to combat, especially given mask requirements in many places still, enforced social distancing, and wariness of crowds such as sporting events, concerts, farmers’ markets, and cruises … nobody wants to end up forcefully trapped and quarantined of a boat which has already happened. 

There are a few things experts suggest for battling Apathy:

  • One is to use a planner (on your computer, or old-school paper) and plan out the overburdensome list of things you need to do, don’t plan too much in one day, do important highlights in pink and softer to-do’s in yellow, and stay FIRM to that calendar. 
  • Walk or exercise for half an hour each day if you are not already active.
  • Engage with nature and your senses. Focus on the nature happening around you … the birds, the squirrels, the rustling leaves and branches of trees.
  • Try breathing exercises such as 5-5-5 or 4-7-8 to help cleanse the mind and make it ready to take on new things (you can Goggle these).

Let me know what your starting point happens to be, and what you are doing to take steps back to “normalcy.” I do not think we will ever be “normal” again, but we can try to get close.

Blessings and to success,

Baer

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THINGS WE LOST WITH COVID

12 March, 2022

THINGS WE LOST WITH COVID

Aside from the losses of family, friends, and loved ones to Covid, the survivors now live in a very different world. Young children never knew a world without masks. There was a State law mask-mandate in New Jersey until this last week. Masks are now optional and as crowed as our city-scape is, I would guess maybe only half of all people still wear them. For some like me, it is situational. If I am in a crowd or someplace I am not comfortable with, I wear it. When Covid number rise again, which epidemiologists are certain will happen 1. Due to increased summertime travel (after two years of practically no major vacations outside the US border), and 2. The normal rise in general infections come fall and winter. I am supposed to go to a family wedding (my rare opportunity to see both of my beloved sisters at the same time) in Upstate New York in August, assuming I can get a cabin with its own bathroom. You know me, my sense of adventure and the great wild way is going to Short Hills Mall before the store doors to Chanel and Cartier are open and I am navigating oblivious women with strollers. The wedding will be at a camp ground and outdoors so I am moderately nervous about the mask thing because USNY tends to be Trump Land so vaccinations are likely hit-and-miss.

One thing that was lost, or covered up by, was simple social politeness, greetings as we pass each other walking down the sidewalk. I have always greeted strangers, or people I encountered daily, on the sidewalk with a smile and a “Good morning,” or whatever time of the day it was. You cannot see that in a mask. People stopped trusting one another and the sidewalks became danger zones where you shuffled past oncoming pedestrians as quickly as possible. This last week as I traversed the sidewalks with no mask, I went back to my normal smile and greet, and I noticed two things that that pre-covid rarely happened: almost everyone I greeted refused to make eye contact and none of them returned to greeting. People appear to not want to invest themselves in basic humanity anymore.

There is also a crowd shift, a Great Migration, taking place. Shops and restaurants in metropolitan New York have closed due to covid. Available amenities have downsized, moved, or closed for reasons ranging from difficulty finding employees to supply chain issues to difficulty maintaining enough of a retail client base to stay open. One serious trend we are seeing are the large number of families who are tired of Covid measures in congested areas like ours who are fleeing enmasse to larger houses and spaces, large yards for play further apart from the neighbors, and down payments that match trying to keep kids in private schools near New Your City and pay exorbitant rent or mortgages. Zoom and telecommuting have made such moves easier on parents who no longer need to share the breakfast table with their children as a work space.

My personal travel is hopefully going to improve this year since it has been two years since I last visited my normal haunts. I am looking at my beloved Spain, Ireland, and Switzerland. It will rest largely on quarantining laws crossing borders. All I want is to lay under a straw umbrella with my toes in the sand at Puerta Banus Marbella and order my pilpil from the nearby chirangita. Ah, one can hope. For those of you who do not want the hassles of crossing the US border, keep in mind that Puerto Rico and the US Virgin Islands are US territories so you can come and go freely. And there is a Ritz-Carleton on St. Thomas so that you don’t have to feel like you are roughing it.

The supply chain has been severely disrupted, and although it has affected everything from clothes to cars, I am talking specifically food and groceries. I could not get my base-supply of Pellegrino for over a month. We ended up buying a Soda Stream, which is not as convenient as opening a Pellegrino, but it serves its purpose. Markets are out of lots of things. My favorite health cereal has been MIA for over a month. My flavored Pellegrino is represented by only one 8-pack each … once I buy them, the shelves are empty. Even things I would never buy amaze me. Products are lined up at the edge of the shelf, one unit deep and ten wide in order to give the appearance there is more there than there actually is. Because of this, Amazon has become my go-to. Not that I want to give this power to Bezos, but desperate times call for things that actually work.

Think of what has been important you that has been affected by covid. Have you been able to work around these issues, or have you put them out of sight/out of mind for now. 

And do not forget to smile at a stranger. It might be the only one they get that day.

Blessings,

Baer